Screen-Shot-2014-08-15-at-4.01.27-PM-1280x730Police in Ferguson, Missouri beheaded an American journalist today.

According to multiple reports, Edward Baxter was working on a story inside a local McDonald's when police approached and asked him to hand over his laptop.... Read More →

 

477850221The urban myth of the “brown note” - a noise which causes uncontrollable bowel movements - has became reality in Ferguson, Missouri.

Today police used a device called the B-Note 300XS to disperse protesters gathered for the killing of unarmed 18-year-old Michael Brown. It creates a frequency of 5 to 9 Hz and was successful in causing unsuspecting protesters to defecate themselves in public.... Read More →

 

458307445Russia has seen a massive drop in obesity rates and related diseases since it banned food imports from the United States and Europe.

Moscow has halted imports of sodas, candy, junk food and other processed food from the West in retaliation for economic sanctions on its oil and banking sectors.... Read More →

 

icebucketchallengeLocal authorities in California are handing out massive fines to anyone participating in the "ALS Ice Bucket Challenge" fundraiser on the grounds they are wasting water.

In Los Angeles, which is living through its worst drought in generations, the Department of Water & Power and the Police Department have long been cracking down on unnecessary water usage.... Read More →

 

Justin-Bieber-sickSinger Justin Bieber has been hospitalized with the ebola virus.

According to local reports, the teen heartthrob contracted the disease while visiting a fan with cancer at Emory University Hospital in Atlanta, the same facility where two American ebola patients are being treated.

... Read More →

 

Coulter_3Ann Coulter suggested today that America should infect migrant children with ebola in order to discourage illegal immigration.

In an interview this morning on Fox News, the controversial conservative commentator was asked how she would handle the growing humanitarian crisis caused by the arrival of thousands of unaccompanied children from Central America.... Read More →

 

FBI-RaidA Special Weapons and Tactics unit raided an illegal bingo game at Pleasant Place Nursing Home in Glendale, AZ yesterday, killing one and injuring seven.

The night’s winner, Cynthia Wellington, was collecting her winnings when a dozen SWAT members, armed with assault rifles, rushed the room and demanded to see everyone’s identification.... Read More →

 

99847538The Kingdom of Saudi Arabia announced today that it is leaning toward finally allowing its female population to use forks.

The highly anticipated move comes as the autocratic Islamic regime faces ongoing criticism around the world for its record on women’s rights, which critics say is among the worst in the word.... Read More →

 

radicalathiestbombingA group of radical atheists claimed responsibility for a suicide bombing in Iraq today.

This morning the normally peaceful southern town of Al-Lamkan was rocked by a powerful explosion in a crowded fruit market that killed 29 people and injured over 50.... Read More →

 

WarrenSenator Elizabeth Warren punched a banking lobbyist in the face today during a meeting at her Capitol Hill office.

According to multiple sources, the Massachusetts Democrat assaulted a Goldman Sachs lobbyist after he tried to gain her support for a bill that would weaken derivatives regulations.... Read More →

 

hillaryrunHillary Clinton responded to a reporter's question about the 2016 presidential elections today by saying that she is running.

The surprise announcement came today at a public park about half a mile from the Clintons' residence in Chappaqua, New York.... Read More →

 

New York Giants v New England PatriotsFormer NFL quarterback Tim Tebow was struck by lightning today.

According to local reports, the deeply religious college star is recovering in a New Mexico hospital after being hit with a burst of lightning in a Home Depot parking lot on a mostly sunny day.... Read More →

Close